Burning Nomads

IMG_5108.JPGOne of the things that I like about big goals and dreaming big is the way the thought of the goal itself sets a spark that lights a fire in my core. The fire focuses me. It excites me. It lets me know I’m alive.

The last big fire went out the second the announcer at Ironman Louisville said my name to step right up and grab my golden ticket to the big show in Kona. The relief washed over me with the same intensity as the fire that burned to get me there.

Since that day, however, I haven’t even felt a flicker, let alone a belly full of fire. For the most part, that’s a good thing. I needed a break, as I’ve written before, the mental capital I had to spend to get to that moment was almost more than I had saved. I’ve spent the last few months recharging and having a lot of fun.

But, in the past month, I was starting to feel an aimlessness, and I wasn’t really liking it. The drifting into and out of races was no longer enjoyable. I was becoming an endurance nomad, seeking just the right race and right goal for settling.

On July 18, I had the pleasure to pace my husband John for the final 30 miles of the Vermont 100. (For his race report, click here.) The beginning of my pacing segment was a healthy climb up a moderately muddy trail. It was a perfect adventure for a wanderer.

My lungs were filled, my legs were alive, and then I felt it – a flicker.

John at the Vermont 100
John at the Vermont 100

This is pretty fun, I thought to myself, as I skirted a patch of mud.

This is like a game, as I navigated a single track downhill.

This is beautiful, as we came out to a clearing with the expanse of the mountain range all around us.

Each mile was another match to the fire.

My thoughts turned to my own goal of running 100 miles at the Javelina Jundred in October, 2015. Granted, the course at Javelina will be nothing like that of the VT100, other than the distance, but as John and I ran, the fire in my belly began to cast a familiar glow around my next big dream.

As we continued through the miles, I felt like I was heading home, a nomadic adventurer finding her waystation in the trails. As we shuttled along, my main focus was to keep John moving–he was in the last third of his big dream, and it was my job to make sure he saw it come true.

At one point, it started to downpour. I mean all of the raindrops. It lasted for a heavy, windy, soaking 15-20 minutes, and while it was cold and I was a bit concerned it would continue through the night, John and I started to really move.

The rain freshened him up, as it had been getting a little humid and hot, and running in the rain is one of my all-time favorite conditions. We were in rhythm. We were running.

Despite being soaked through after the storm passed, I could feel the fire burning a little hotter.

A week later, I was running trails in Lake Placid. Hopping rocks, scuttling over plank board shoots, and toeing up rock face summits.

It was physically challenging and mentally demanding, requiring focus to stay upright and moving forward.

After these adventures, it’s confirmed: I’m no longer wandering. This nomad is burning again and I’m ready to challenge my limits in the desert of Arizona. It seems a fitting place to settle (at least for until the next big dream).

Since Javelina will be my first first attempt at 100 miles, the basic goal is to get to the starting line healthy, to push myself in training in new ways that will make me strong and powerful, and to cross the finish line with a smile (even if my body aches).

But, the fire does burn a little deeper than these goals.

Like many of you, I’ve got a few goals. The basic one is to finish healthy. The next level up is a sub-24 hour finish. And the best-day scenario is my super-secret goal I’m still wrapping my head around. These goals excite me and the different type of training I’ll be doing motivates me to keep pushing my limits.

Ah, yes, it feels good to be home.

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Some pictures from my trail adventures in Lake Placid. 

 

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